"Finally you won't have to smash the buttons anymore...AND you'll be able to see what time it is!" He was grinning ear to ear, proud of this gift, knowing this was something I had needed for a long time.
I hesitated.
Yes, my alarm clock had seen better days. Yes, sometimes the buttons called for back up reinforcement (thank you very much Sharpie pen cap). And yes, the digits on the little screen were getting hard for me to read in my old age...but I haven't had the heart to part with it.
I invested in the Sony Dream Machine in the summer of 1997 just before I headed off to college. I used my graduation money because I knew better than to ask my parents for a $100 alarm clock. I chose this one because it had a digital screen AND I could either wake up to the buzzer OR music. Bonus: I didn't have to guess what station it was on because again, it was digital, and I had total control. Score.
The Dream Machine has been next to my bed for 19 years. At times I've joked that this alarm clock is the one thing that's been with me for almost my entire adulthood (if you can count college as adulthood?!) Even my favorite pieces of jewelry haven't stuck around this long.
I think the look on my face gave it away...was I ready to pull the plug on the Dream Machine and replace it with a shinier, newer model? I felt conflicted. It might sound silly, but clearly I have an emotional connection to this alarm clock.
Memories flooded my heart...good ones and bad. The best moments of my life have been witnessed by this alarm clock, along with moments when my heart was breaking into a million pieces. The Dream Machine woke me up on the day my parents got divorced, the day I graduated from college, they day I packed up my life and moved to Georgia, my first day of school as a teacher, my wedding day in 2005, the day I started my own company, the day I become a mother, the day we buried my mother in law, the day I realized I was having a nervous breakdown, the day I knew I had to leave my marriage, my first day as a "single mom", the day I surrendered my life to God again, the day I felt like I could finally breathe again, the day we signed our book deal, the day I met my {now} husband Clay, the day I fell in love again...I could go on.
The Dream Machine has been through 19 years of dreams with me...some have worked out better than others. While I have grown through the tears and the joy, this little black box has stayed the same.
I had a completely different post planned for this week's blog, but for some reason I felt led to share this instead. Is it crazy to feel so connected to something that just plugs into a wall? Are my sentiments random and crazy or is there something in your life you've held on to, solely for the memories it holds?
I pulled the plug on Friday night. A shiny new alarm clock with big digital numbers and fancy buttons now sits next to my bed. I am ready to embrace this next phase of my life, finally letting go of something that I've held on to for so long. I know the next 19 years will be filled with wonderful new memories as I continue to dream.
As for the Dream Machine? I've retired it to my office...because it still works and you never know when you'll need back up :)
