a wedding, the crock pot, and starting over.

Yep folks, it's true.

I got hitched...again.

A lot has happened in the past 6 months...my boyfriend proposed, we got married, and the girls and I packed up our house and moved. All while the school year wrapped up and summer was in full swing. Oh, and did I mention the "blending" of 4 kids?

All 4 of them started school this week and the afternoon sports schedules are already in full swing.

Yes, indeed. It has been a whirlwind!

In the midst of this madness, I've had some random epiphanies. Here's a little sneak peek into what's been going on in my brain...

• Changing your name is quite possibly the most annoying process. Ever.
• After years of resistance I have finally caved in to the Crock Pot. It really is the magic dinner solution.
• Band-Aids must be kept in the car, along with umbrellas, a hair brush, and detangling spray.
• Going to bed early (a.k.a. before midnight) makes for a much happier Holiday.
• My husband is amazing.  He knows exactly what I need and when I need it. Even if that means taking the kids out solo and giving me some peace and quiet : )
• Volunteering to be the Cheerleading Squad Team Mom is going to be lots of fun. LOTS of fun. And definitely worth my time...because Elizabeth will totally remember all of this and repay me with a fancy nursing home one day.
• www.signupgenius.com is just plain GENIUS (team moms everywhere will agree).
• Kids are more flexible than we think. The girls are adjusting beautifully to their new bedrooms, schools, and big brother and sister.
• Getting married again was scary...and emotional...and overwhelming (I would be lying if I didn't say this). 
• Writing my vows was the most intense, challenging, and important writing assignment of my life. Our vows to each other meant more to me than any other words I've ever said.
• I love my basement. It's dark and cold and quiet. I can hide down here and no one will find me!
• My free weights are collecting dust and my arms are kind of jigglier than they used to be.
• Doing business with friends makes business much more fun...I have to give Valerie a shout out for keeping up with the Ex Wives' social media while I've been on "vacation". Her last blog post made me smile and cry...all at the same time. It was the perfect wedding gift and meant the world to me.
• When you listen to your gut (like reeeaaalllly listen), your intuition will not steer you wrong.
• Falling in love again is scary...but so worth it.
• Just because I'm married again doesn't mean I've forgotten what it's like to get divorced.

This is a new start for me and our family, and although there are some growing pains, I know it is all worthwhile.

As for the Ex Wives...we are in the process of finalizing a publishing deal and couldn't be more excited about the opportunities that lay ahead...this is going to be our best year ever!

xoxo
the Mrs.

Hello Again and Married Again

Hello again.  It has been a while since you have last heard from the Ex-Wives.

No - we didn't decide that all this putting ourself out there was just too much for the ego to handle so we stopped.

No - we didn't get in some huge "cat fight" (although some might figure how could two exes to the same man get along, as in continue to get along, as in really?!?).

Lastly no - we didn't win the lottery and say screw helping people by being real, time to spend our days on a real mission to buy every pair of shoes in the new SJP line at Nordstroms' to help ourselves and our calves look miles longer!!!  Although if this last lottery scenario were to happen, to either one of us, we warn you it would be rather tempting…

I think it has been a while since you have seen a post from either one of us because life has changed.  For both of us really, but we are going to shine the spotlight one one particular Ex-Wife who has had more than a couple MAJOR life changing events happen.

My life - well let's just say I've been living in a comedy of sorts.  But this post is not about me and my update in the next coming weeks will be sure to make you laugh and be glad you aren't me.

Within the last 10 months Holiday has met "the one", dizzily dated in the land of happiness, is engaged, moving her family in less than a week, and getting married this month.  Yes - life indeed has been a fast track of happiness in the Happily Ever After department for her.

I'm sure Holiday has mixed feelings with sharing this with all of you, so I've decided to do it for her as a sort of wedding present.  What do you get the girl that already has every brightly colored monogrammed item (no really - look at the presents she has been posting on her Facebook wall…), a fiancé who both supports and loves her, and a new extended family that is both photogenic to the eyes and more importantly making a life long imprint on her heart?  Well you give her a blog post.

I say mixed feelings because Holiday really does believe in marriage.  Writing and blogging on divorce would deem one naturally to think that we don't believe in marriage or are anti-marriage.  Wrong -o.  We believe in being SMART and ORGANIZED during a divorce and investing in yourself as well as your future.  That also rings true of being single, being divorced, being married, and so on - the woman who invests in herself, invests in all those she is connected to.

We believe that just because your union blessed by God, The Universe, Oprah, or whatever you believe in wasn't meant to be, doesn't mean that there isn't a better union out there waiting for you at some point.  Even if that means you are contemplating, going through, or are officially divorced, it will all be okay and play out the way it should - we promise you.  The silver lining many times involves a double lining for most again down the road.

Holiday didn't want to be divorced, nor did she ever dream her children would be a part of a two household family.  In fact, at first it was an absolute nightmare to her.  She thrives when she is loving and supporting her inner circle of immediate family, so naturally she was lost for a while.  During and after her divorce she found her circle was now a dot, with other dots close by, just no longer connected.  And nobody wants to re-connect dots once they have already seen the full picture.

But luckily Holiday realized her old dot to connected dot picture needed reconnecting.  Let's just say instead of a circle, her old picture was more of a "hex"agon with a flanking octagon (a.k.a. stop sign).  Sure - parts of it externally were the full picture, but certainly not internally.  And I think anyone who has ever divorced can tell you that exact moment they experienced the feeling of being Cinderella and choosing to instead flick off the other glass slipper into the damn footman's head and run barefoot as fast as you can and to a land far far away from the supposed fairytale gone wrong.

So I think, if I am guessing here but probably hitting the nail on the head, Holiday feels caught between two lives right now.  Her eyes and heart are on a woman who is facing, affected by, and entering a married life - her new life.  Her mission and memories are tied to a woman who has dedicated her life to helping women facing, affected by, entering, or going through a divorce life - her old life.

She will always be an "Ex-Wife" to someone, and that will not change just because she is about to be a  "Wife" to someone else.  Even as she enters this marriage, I know just how qualified she is to be both titles.  The most inspiring thing about Holiday - even though she is on cloud 9 right now (okay maybe on cloud 8 but after the move can jump clouds to number 9…), she is still ready, willing, and able to help anyone in need of guidance during the divorce process.  Yep - that's our girl.

So I've written her a list of things to remember and remember and remember again as she runs rings around her new "Circle of Trust" and enters marriage with the one she believes God sent to her:

- When you live your life from a center of love, it's somehow always going to be alright.
- Make sure to always listen to your intuition.  If that's not speaking loud enough then listen to me.
- Never forget the clouds - sometimes you need the shade in order to appreciate just how special sunshine really is.
- When you feel overwhelmed meditate.  When that doesn't work we'll drink a bottle of wine.
- Never go to bed angry.  Smartest thing my Grandmother ever taught me from her 40+ year marriage.
- Buy this book.  And don't blush when doing it.  Think this could save millions of marriages.  http://www.amazon.com/101-Nights-Great-Sex-Anticipation/dp/0962962872/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1402270378&sr=8-1&keywords=100+nights+of+great+sex
- Don't lose yourself.  Ever.  For anybody.
- Make smart financial decisions together and always lay dibs on anything from Pottery Barn.
- Communicate openly and communicate honestly from a place of wanting to improve not prove.
- When you have the choice to be right or kind, be kind.  Unless he's just totally wrong.
- With an "equator" (as you lovingly refer to your fiancé) your highs and lows will always be brought back to the middle - and this my friend is priceless.

I wish you the Happily Ever After you have dreamed of and deserve - however I charge you to always be your own heroine.  Going into this marriage I know you are wiser, gentler, and pointing your compass north towards "His" warmth.

"Storms make trees take deeper roots."  - Dolly Parton

With Love,
Valerie (The Other Ex-Wife)

Clap Along if That's What You Want to Do-a

In our last post Holiday boldly declared that she and I have a certain disease.  We would like to thank all of you for your prayers and concerns during this trying time as we seek treatment.

The disease of "Perfectionism" is one often mis-diagnosed as "If Only I Drink More Caffiene I Can Get It All Done by 1a.m.ism" (Holiday's closest diagnosis) or my personal favorite "Martha Stewart Wannabeism" (My current diagnosis).  But seriously… we both know we have a problem and are working on it.

Just today I wanted to make an inspirational collage in order to prep myself for writing my new blog entry, but literally slapped the scissors out of my own hands screaming at myself "Valerie stop putting the cart before the horse dammit!!!".  Not sure why I referred to myself in 3rd person, or thought making a collage of inspirational quotes would help me write better, (or the more important question why I thought writing was the "horse" and a collage was the "cart", I know totally random) but I did.  Then I stopped.  Then I poured a glass of wine and chilled the hell out.  Then I wrote this in less than an hour.

Lately I have been happy.  Reallllly happy.  This has served as my mostly successful treatment so far for "Perfectionism".

You know the kind of happy I'm talking about - the kind that is normally only reserved for the best kind of new love, or really good sex, or a reallllllly good shoe sale.  Where you are standing in line for groceries, and people are staring at you, and you think it's because they see you glowing from the outside in, but then suddenly you realize it's because you have blue toothpaste on the white t-shirt you are wearing (inside out as a side note) smeared all over your left boob.  You are so preoccupied with the non-stop runaway train of happy thoughts tunneling through your head you didn't even notice or care the past 10 hours you have been wearing an inside out, tartar control crusted ensemble since you brushed your teeth.  Come on, you know it's happened to you too because I know there is a DSW (Designer Shoe Warehouse) where shoes are always on sale in like every town in good ol' US of A.

And that's been me lately - not because of any of the three reasons stated above - unless new love refers to the way it feels when you are helping women who need only the kind of help and advice you can give.  As someone who has been there, done that, and owns a closet full of "I got divorced and all I got is this lousy t-shirt" t-shirts.  But instead of me getting stared at by strangers in a white t-shirt inside out, it was black leggings that even Good Will wouldn't take that has a gaping hole where the stitching has given out by the waistband and had not just blue but what appeared to be neon play dough smeared all over my right pant butt cheek.  I have a 5 year old, stuff like that happens.  A lot.

With all of the crazy positive changes going on in the lives of The Ex-Wives, I just can't stop smiling.  Every time I turn on the radio that catchy song 'Happy' by Pharrell Williams is playing, and I feel like it's playing just for me.  Everywhere I go birds are singing, and I feel like they're singing just for me.  Every time I open my mailbox I am getting a postcard about "Double Points Month" or $10 off Birthday Coupons for DSW, and I know it's just for me (well that one because it's addressed with my name on it…).  

I don't want to let go of this happy and I don't want to revert back to my old ways of thinking the bottom is going to fall out at any given moment.  Because that is exactly how I felt in each and every one of my marriages.  If I could have just been a little more "perfect" maybe one of my exes would have loved me a little more.  I was consumed with trying to be perfect, because my marriages were farrrrrr from perfect (or happy for that matter).  As in if you could hear some of the stories your mouths would drop and you would feel so bad for me you would give me your DSW coupon because you know you are allowed to combine more than one coupon there even on their super twice a year shoe clearance (It's true!!!!).

My 5 year old doesn't care if I'm perfect - hell he thinks perfect is when I let him eat a cookie for breakfast or when we wear pajamas all day.  But you better bet he cares and notices if I'm happy.  None of my friends care if I'm perfect - in fact they have been laughing for years at my imperfections which make me who I am.  And laughing at me makes them happy, which in turn makes me happy.  And if I am not happy, then watch out, because damn if my friends aren't going to pull out all the stops to bring a smile to my face (disco balls and wind machines have made frequent appearances as well as voo doo dolls….).   My clients are wonderful and expect me to help them organize, but never "perfect" their homes or lives, which makes me even happier because I am a really crappy driller and if they ever really looked closely at the shelves I am putting up in their closets for them I am putting tons of extra holes in their dry wall.

And I challenge ALL OF YOU to find this happy.  What we look for we often times seek - so stop looking at all that stuff that is only going to make you incredibly un-happy.  Because if you close your eyes, and instead open your heart, you might join in on my tune.  It's amazing what you might see, or where more importantly you might find yourself.  My guess is somewhere that people don't give a damn about being perfect.  Most likely you'll "Feel like a room without a roof-a".

I'm not letting go of this new found "Happy".  This new happy is when a friend of a friend's co-worker calls me because she heard I was one of "The Ex-Wives" and is a "Divorce Expert" of sorts.  This new happy is when I know deep down in my soul that God gave Holiday and I the ability to write, oh yeah and the same ex-husband, so that we could help millions of women with our book, our good energy, and our ability to help you get your groove back.  This new happy is where I'm singing along as loud as I can not quite in-tune with my sunroof down through the Starbucks drive-through lined up 10 deep with cars because I know "What happiness means to you - hey hey hey".

Because if I am vulnerable enough to admit all the mistakes I have made, and do so to help others, I'd say I am doing just fine. Further, if I continue to put my everything into helping get rid of the stigmata that accompanies divorce or being a single mother, then life is better than fine it's good.  In fact it is better than good, I'd say it is HAPPY.  And if I didn't let 3 ex-husbands stand in my way of happiness, I am sure as hell not going to let "Perfectionism".

Love,
V (Valerie)

lights, camera, action

In my last post I promised to be real, let go of the "perfection" and just write. So here we go...

Up until now, our blog posts have mostly revolved around our personal lives (ya know, embarrassing stories about kids, ex husbands, divorce disasters, etc.) but we've decided to expand things a bit and let our readers in on another side of our lives...the journey of writing, promoting, and ultimately, publishing, a book.  The Ex Wives' Guide to Divorce has truly been a labor of love, and after almost a year of writing, we're excited to announce the shift forward into the next phase of the game.

Last night was a first for us. Valerie and I sat in a television studio and filmed our first on camera interview. It was so cool! We got all beautified and arrived at the studio like rock stars (well, not really...but it sounds much better that way). Within ten minutes we were on the stage, getting wired with mics and adjusting ourselves to make sure the cameras would hit us on our "good sides". Our interviewer was fantastic (tthank you EW!) and once the cameras started rolling Valerie and I were in our element. It only took 2 takes (again, thank you EW!) for us to nail it. We're hoping it's exactly what our agent had in mind : )

You might be thinking...why did you do an on-camera interview? Valerie and I both have pretty bubbly personalities, and our agent requested an on-camera interview so the publishing houses we are pitching to can see the "real" Ex Wives. I think we did a pretty good job of telling our story on camera- we talked about how we met, why we wrote The Ex Wives' Guide to Divorce, and also explained why women need this book.

Once we finished shooting, Valerie and I whipped out our iPhones and started snapping pics...here are a few of my favorites! It all started with an attempted selfie with the cameras in the background...then it progressed into photo-bombing...which translated into (last pic) a selfie with an *attempted* photo bomb! The last picture just makes me LAUGH- it seriously looks like Valerie is flying through the air...priceless :) How did we ever survive without iPhones?!?!

 *poor Valerie has been battling a yucky cold...she looked pretty good for being all doped up on cough medicine!

*No Ex Wives were harmed during the making of this interview*

*SPECIAL THANKS TO C.P. and E.W. FOR MAKING THIS PRODUCTION POSSIBLE!

I have a confession...

Well hello, there. It's been a while. It's been a long while, actually...so long that I'm due for a confession.

I'm a perfectionist.

Part of the reason I have a hard time blogging consistently is because I want every post, every sentence, every paragraph to be perfect. And that's a pretty tough standard to set for yourself, especially when your goal is to write at least once a week. Rather than put myself through torture of possibly falling short, I just don't write. Because unless it's going to be a slam dunk of a post, I would rather not put it out there for the world to see.

Guess what? I'm ready to let that go.

During the process of writing The Ex Wives' Guide to Divorce I've learned a lot about myself. If you've ever written a book you know what I'm talking about. For example, I've realized that without a deadline it won't get done... and my creative juices peak between the hours of 10pm and 2am (not exactly convenient with 2 little kids, but that's what coffee is for).

Valerie and I are cut from the same cloth, and while sometimes that's a GREAT thing, there are times it paralyzes us. We both have awesome ideas, creative skills and incredible motivation. On the flip side, we both feel the need to deliver the absolute BEST in anything and everything we do. Hence the minimal blog posts. I'd bet you $20 she doesn't write as much as she wants on this blog because she's just like me (no, I haven't even mentioned this to her). We both want every post to be off the charts hilarious, clever, witty, and full of all things genius. Obviously.

We have so many exciting things in the works with our book- and some other really, really exciting things we can't even talk about yet. Eeeeeeek! The future is definitely bright for the Ex Wives...but our success wouldn't be complete without some friends to cheer us on. Writing and publishing a book is a journey, it's an experience, and it's pretty darn cool. In addition to sharing our personal stories and divorce experiences/advice, we're going to give you a sneak peek into the adventures of publishing a book. We'll even keep you in the loop on our progress. So check back with us often- instead of writing the "perfect" blog post I'm just going to keep it real. Mini victories, big victories, disappointments, failures...whatever it is, we want to be an open book for you, our readers...our cheerleaders...our supporters...our fans (oooooh, that sounds so fancy!)

xoxo Holiday
  

Snowmageddon Part II

For all of you that follow us, you know The Ex-Wives live in Atlanta.  And for all of you that don't live under a rock, you know Atlanta due to snow and ice has for the past 3 days and counting been closed / shut down for business / come back ya'll when our roads are free of that fucking white stuff.

Yes, an entire city shut down due to 2.5 inches of snow.  Not shut down due to snow specifically, but due to what the fluffy little white flakes did to the minds and roads of our beloved city:  flooded us with everyone leaving at the exact same time, put us in a literal stand still, and eventually caused many to abandon the plan (plan: Get the Hell Home!!!) and just ditch the car if it wasn't already in a ditch to skate home to loved ones.

Tuesday night will always be remembered as the night the majority of Hotlantans went old school.  Over the river and through the woods on foot to our child's school or home or to Home Depot for a night of shelter everyone went, many after 5 - 12 hours in the car for what should have been a 30 minute drive.

For the other ex-wife this was a semi-realty.  Her day kind of went like this:  Minivan in ditch, trek home by foot, pick up bottle of wine at gas station, sent an S.O.S. to (our) ex to pick up their girls, hopefully before midnight.  She states it was just a big fat sign and bigger fatter sign that her wedding that almost didn't happen 9 years ago to the day was slightly doomed.  She celebrated with humor and photos up on Facebook, some in her wedding garb.  

For this ex-wife, it is the biggest fattest reminder of what happened during Snowmageddon 1, just three years ago, and how very very (very) different my life is now.  You see three years ago, we indeed had a similar snowfall (just not smack damn in the middle of the work day with kids in school).  With everything iced over the city was also shut down for 3 days.  

So what happened to me personally besides the usual contemplation of how did I grow up in the Midwest and survive the cold for so long?  Well I was literally trapped in my old marital house with my soon to be ex-husband as we were just starting the business of divorce, as I had emphatically declared just a couple days previously after finding out what I did that is was over - take off your ring - adios and I plan on taking the piñata - I was Audi 5000.  We had already separated into different bedrooms, but only by a couple days at that point.  F-U-N with a capital "UN".  

See our house (which we were newly contemplating over how we would proceed with selling that btw was worth less than we owed thanks to being in midst of both the economy and the housing market bottoming out)  had a lower level double garage entry.  As in we had a steep curvy driveway with a straight drop down and sharp curve to get into said garage.  Further, as in, there was no way on God's frozen green earth we were getting out anytime soon.  

There I was, trapped in a house with someone you not only wanted to throw darts every time you saw them, but had to pretend for the sake of our two year old son it was business as usual.  I couldn't angrily flip the "open" sign to "closed" so I decided instead to flip out privately.  So here was the frosty overview of the last time I was snowed / iced in:

Day 1 (The 3 of us being trapped in the "marital home"):

Morning:
- Our son Liam exclaimed "Mommy - the clouds are falling!!!"  We laughed at the innocence of a 2 yr old and I cried on the inside knowing his life was about to turn upside down. 
Afternoon:
- We went sledding, made hot cocoa, and pretended we were still the fairy tale family.  I "mistakingly" steered our sled into my soon to be ex's legs at one point which caused him pain and made me smile.  But I swear it was a mistake, I swear on my love of the Green Bay Packers.  (I'm originally from Chicago…)
Evening:
- Been inside toooo long - wishing I had bought a deluxe dart set for Christmas - damn 2 yr old and so-called "safety concerns".

Day 2 (Still trapped):

Morning:

- Our neighbor who normally watched our son during the work day said he was "open" since he ran his "school" out of his house - so I piled our son in the wagon and skidded on over to his house as fast as my boots would take me.  My soon to be ex said he would have to work all day via his laptop and barricaded himself in the bedroom he was now sleeping in.  This made me both angry and happy - kind of the theme for the following 6 months we would have to reside together.

Afternoon:

- I took on the project of organizing our entire house to get ready for the impending listing.  And by took it on, I really mean slammed shit and was as dramatic as a 13yr old girl going through puberty.

Evening:

- Put son to bed early.  Decided to go through wardrobe - bad idea - I was still fat.  The divorce diet had not yet kicked in.  Took out pen and paper and wrote out my new divorce diet.  Cried myself to sleep.

Day 3 (Still trapped like a caged rabid animal without darts):

Morning:

- Skidding over to drop son off at neighbors again.  On the way home tried to purchase a dart set on amazon but my stupid gloves wouldn't push the right things on my iPhone and lost internet connection. Threw phone in snow.  It never quite recovered, nor did I.

Afternoon:

- Had a "Come to Jesus" meeting with my soon to be ex hiding, I mean working, in the guest bedroom.  Told him he HAD to get outside with a shovel RIGHT NOW and pick / dig / scrape with his bare hands all of the ice off the driveway so we could get out.  I just couldn't take being trapped in the house anymore. Plus I had run out of things to organize so I could have the illusion of control.  He was quick to grab the shovel and took him 4+ hours but our drive was ice free by the time the sun was setting. 

Evening:

- New plan, soon to be ex continue to hide, he can put our son to bed while I meet some neighborhood girlfriends to walk to a restaurant that was rumored to be open a couple blocks away (that served wine, did I mention that?).  Stopped by next door neighbors house on way back from aforementioned restaurant (they served more wine, did I mention that?).  Made scene, couldn't explain what was truly going on, went to bed sobbing so hard I had to throw my pillow out the next day.

Day 4 (Free but not "free")

Morning:

- Finally "free" - drove to Costco to get a new pillow.  Cried in car on way home while son kept saying over and over "Costco Mommy, Costco Mommy, We go to Costco Mommy!" all the while wishing someone could "dig" me out of my impending divorce situation.

Afternoon:

- Can't remember - was still in a haze from the night before (wine….) and decided to try out my new pillow and nap with my son.

Evening:

- The three of us went to dinner and acted again like nothing had happened.  Life was "back to usual" as it would be for the next 6 months while we pretended like life had not changed on the outside while simultaneously hemorrhaging on the inside with sadness.

Now this week - totally different experience for same situation of a city shut down - just three years later.  Awoke that morning to my now 5 year old son coughing his head off.  He had woken up about 4 times during the middle of the night and complained that morning of a tummy ache and was about as pleasant as Oscar the Grouch.  Let me set the record straight - my son is a sound sleeper who has NEVER missed a day of kindergarden yet for being sick.  He normally wakes up early every morning with rainbows shooting out of his ass.  Which let's me know God does indeed have a sense of humor because I am soooo not a morning person.  

For him to be so out of synch with himself, I knew I couldn't send him to school.  Lucky for me my plan was to work for a client at home, so figured keeping him home, especially if he was asking to stay home for the first time ever was the logical thing to do.  Plus there was that prediction of possible snow fall so why not.  I swear - it was like my son was some animal that senses the tsunami or earthquake coming and runs for shelter…

Day 1 (Just the 2 of us in our "rental home"):

Morning:
We were already at home when the snow started and it looked beautiful.  I was reading and Liam was no longer feeling sick (I think Sesame Street helped with that).  We simultaneously caught the shimmer only the first few snowflakes can magically produce.  He jumped up at screamed "Can we go sledding??  It's BEAUTIFUL Mommy!!!"  And I exclaimed "I want to get some things organized so maybe after?!?  Yay!" But I didn't see yay in his eyes as I started to make out my list of everything and anything to organize.  Then I realize NO.  In fact a HELL NO.  The next couple days will be spent playing and watching movies and creating memories.  If I get a couple "To Do's" knocked off my list - great!  If I don't oh well.  I WILL NOT RE-LIVE the forced activities of Snowmageddon I - for Pete's sake this was Snowmageddon II, and even though the City of Atlanta learned nothing from the first shut down 3 years ago I sure as heck did.
Afternoon:
We go sledding down Mr. Steve's steep drive, hang out with neighbors swapping tales of the last time it snowed this much (see above - I won), talked to everyone walking up the street that had to ditch their cars, made snow angels (my son went face first - this is how I truly know he is a Southerner - didn't understand snow angels are best done on your back…), and only went inside when we all wanted hot chocolate.  I just happened to have a full canister along with 2 cartons of Almond milk.  Score Me - 1, Score Snowmageddon II - 0
Evening:
Made 2 batches of hot chocolate  and went to sleep with perma-grin.  Suffered from acid reflux all night from Hot Chocolate and would do it all over again.  Best.  Day.  Ever.

Day 2 (School cancelled, streets still sheets of ice):

Morning:
Wake up to Liam running into my room exclaiming "Happy Snow Day Mommy!"  
Afternoon:
Sledding down Bunky Hill all afternoon in our neighborhood.  About 15 adults and 40 kids from our neighborhood out there.  F-U-N.  We put the F' Yeah!  in F-U-N.
Evening:
Got a phone call from my brother that his wife was feeling labor pains and that my niece would be here any day.  Went to sleep with prema-grin again.  Best.  Day.  Ever.  Again.

Day 3 (School still cancelled, streets still sheets of ice):

Morning:
Wake up to Liam exclaiming "There's No School Again Mommy - Happy Snow Day!!!"
Afternoon:
See above…  Repeat.
Evening:
See above only this time I got a text from my brother that his wife was in labor and that my niece would be here tonight.  Went to sleep with prema-grin again.  Best.  Day.  Ever.  Again.

So I'm pretty sure day 4 (hopefully the last day!) will be just as good if not "gooder" - and yes I know that is not a word but neither is Snowmageddon and everyone keeps saying that - so just go with it.  

I keep saying it throughout my blog posts…  but time does heal.  And it does help to be trapped in a house with someone you actually don't want to throw darts at, especially if there is no way you are getting out for a couple days. 

Bring on the snow, bring on the ice, and bring on anything you got to keep me near or in my home Mother Nature.  Because I am resilient and I have a shovel.  Most importantly I am someone who doesn't need anyone else to dig me out of this situation, as I will cherish these new snowstorm sized memories for years to come.

- Valerie (of H and V)

Twas the night before my {would be} wedding...9 years ago...

My minivan is stuck in a ditch, I'm eating spaghetti, watching the Bachelor wedding (thanks DVR) and drinking the wine I bought from the gas station during my WALK home.

Oh, and did I mention I'm wearing my wedding dress? And veil?

No, I'm not kidding.

Today could best be described as Groundhog Day meets The Perfect Storm. So I figured go big or go home. Just put the damn dress on, Holiday...
 
Exactly 9 years ago today I was the Bride...to be. That is, of course, until an ice storm hit Atlanta and shut down the entire city.

I will never forget my rehearsal dinner at the Spaghetti Warehouse. Don't ask. No, really...just leave it alone. Our guests were whispering over pasta and garlic rolls, all huddled in a corner, clearly discussing something rather important.

"So, Holiday...what's our plan B for tomorrow?"

"I'm sorry...what do you mean, plan B?????"

I saw the look of fear spread on their faces. I had absolutely NO CLUE. It was obvious. Someone had to tell me.

"Well, honey, there's an ice storm coming through Atlanta tonight...and while it's probably no big deal we should probably have a plan B." This, coming from my wedding planner, who is by far one of the coolest, calmest people on the planet.

PLAN B? REALLY?!?!
THERE IS NO PLAN B.
I AM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW.

Yeah. Turns out I was WRONG. I was not getting married tomorrow. Little did I know, the ICE GODS had something different in mind and froze over the entire city. That was January 28, 2005.

Today is January 28, 2014. Exactly 9 years later. And guess what? The ice gods have spoken AGAIN. I'm pretty sure this day has a giant ice cloud hovering over it.

9 years ago tonight I dreamed of a fairy tale life...the perfect husband, a picture perfect wedding, and a house with a white picket fence. Okay, maybe not so much the white picket fence but you get the idea. If someone gave me a crystal ball and told me in 9 years I would be divorced, writing a book with my ex husbands' first ex wife, and driving a MINIVAN I would have laughed in your face.

Have you ever heard the phrase, "You plan and God laughs"? Yep, God is pretty much having a field day with me. I swear I couldn't make this up if I tried.

So when I woke up to snow this morning I just laughed. Of course it was snowing...I mean, really, why wouldn't it be? I left my house as soon as I got the message school was closing.

Within five minutes my minivan was sliding all over the road. Looking ahead I realized I wasn't going ANYWHERE. There were 8 school buses in front of me, none of which could make it up  the hill we were facing. Lovely. This is awesome. Patience, Holiday, patience...

Fast forward 3 hours. I called the ex husband and told him there was no way I was making it to school. The road my neighborhood is on is one lane each way with very steep hills. NO ONE WAS GOING ANYWHERE.

I turned the minivan around and BAM. Just like that I ended up in a ditch. The minivan was practically vertical and I knew I was stuck. Having listened to my father as a child, I knew how important it was to be prepared. I was wearing UGG boots and had my ski jacket in the car along with a fuzzy hat and gloves. I started the long walk home.

Thankfully I made it home safely (with a bottle of wine tucked in my Louis Vuitton bag courtesy of the gas station). As I was walking through the snow I couldn't help but laugh. What a funny, crazy, wild day. Reflecting on the last 9 years make me smile but also made me cry.

What is it about being a bride that makes women crazy? Is it the veil? I dunno. I'm wearing mine right now and I feel more normal than ever. Maybe it's the crazy expectation that everything will be perfect? Or perhaps the veil blinds us from what we really want to see. What we really need to see. I think that might be worthy of it's own blog post one day :)

I can honestly say that 9 years later I have clarity. More clarity than ever. My sister (and Maid of Honor) would not take no for answer when she called me via face time tonight. We laughed uncontrollably as she took pictures of me in this ridiculous get up. We reminisced about what would have been/should have been my wedding night turned-girl's night IN at our hotel. That night I was surrounded by the family and friends I love most. The people I will love, no matter what, till death do us part.

Tonight I've experienced what some might describe as a full-circle moment. Sitting here in my wedding dress, eating spaghetti, snowed in thanks to an ice storm...but this time I'm alone.The funny thing is I don't feel alone at all. I actually feel pretty awesome.

Cheers to the next 9 years!
xoxo Holiday
p.s. the dress is way too big for me now...just another perk of trying this sucker on 9 years later :)

 

what would an embarrassing moment like this be without a #selfie?!?! Here ya go...