A {not so} Jerry Maguire Moment

We all know the scene. Renee Zellweger. The angry divorced women’s group. The cute kid with spiky hair and glasses. Roll music. Enter Tom Cruise. “…You complete me…you complete me.”

I was a junior in high school when Jerry Maguire hit the big screen, and I clearly remember dreaming of the day someone would say this to me. It seemed like the perfect thing to say to someone you love, someone you just can’t live without. Someone who…completes you. After all, isn’t this what love is all about? Someone to complete us?

It seems perfectly logical to search for the missing puzzle piece to your heart. And when we find it, the answer is simple. We fall in love, get married, and live happily ever after, right?

Here’s the problem with Jerry Maguire. And don’t worry Jerry, I’m not picking on you…this seems to be an epidemic (I’m guilty too). Unlike the search for the next American Idol, the missing puzzle piece to your heart isn’t hiding in a giant sea of people, waiting for their next audition. Your heart is not a diamond in the rough. You won’t find it in a bar, an online dating website, or on your next blind date.

The fact of the matter is this: the missing puzzle piece isn’t missing at all. You’ve had it all this time…you just didn’t realize it was there. You complete you.

I’ve learned the hard way. Being codependent in relationships is a recipe for disaster, and although it took some serious heartache and a massive amount of tears, I’ve accepted this simple truth.

Until I am happy with myself I can’t be happy with anyone else. It sounds cliché, and believe me, I realize it’s easier said than done…but it’s the truth.

In order to move on from my divorce, I had to take a close look in the mirror. I didn’t like everything I saw. I still don’t. But I’m working on it. I’m committed to completing myself. Then, and only then, will I be ready to share my heart with someone else.

-Holiday :)